When I was a child, a day was a very long thing. After breakfast we had hours to play outside before being called home for lunch, and this repeated in the afternoon. Time moved slower then, or so it seemed. I remember long evenings when the family would sit outside with neighbors, discussing the events of the day or week. Maybe it was because television was in its infancy and it didn’t get that much attention. And of course, there were no cell phones or iPads; but regardless, a day sure was long. It gave you time to consider a lot of things.
I remember that I was amazed by my arms and legs, how they could grow. And I have to say that, even though my parents had taught me to repeat the same prayer before I went to sleep every night, I somehow knew there had to be more to life than our daily routine.
In Acts 17:26-27 the Bible says that God planned the exact time and place that we would live, and that He did so with the intention that we would seek Him and find Him. I didn’t know that as a child, of course, but it certainly worked for me.
I had an older sibling, who, from my earliest memory, informed me there would be no sharing between us. I was around two and a half and my sibling was six. I know this because of where the memory took place.
We soon moved to another city, and as we grew, her attitude toward me became more aggressive. Name calling, belittling, turning others against me, saying no one likes you, just skims the surface of what I lived with on a daily basis. This caused me deep pain. All these things had a great effect on me. When you are young, and growing, and trying to figure out who you are, it is a great handicap to be given a daily diet of crushing comments. In fact, I have to say, that this affected the greater part of my life.
Now, I say all this not for pity, because the story doesn’t end there. Remember, I had long days to consider all these things, and that led me to seek for God. The path to Him had lots of twists, and turns, and lessons to be learned; but find Him I did. And now, I understand the wisdom of God in giving me that sibling. My paths were directed to find God by the pain I couldn’t deal with on my own. And the acceptance I longed for from a sibling, I found in Him.
God has been good to me. In so many ways, He has caused things to work out for me, things I could have never done for myself. Though the accusations went on for years, and still may continue, at least they are quite beyond the range of my ears. You can’t spend your life defending yourself from false witnesses. To do so would be to accept a death sentence over the rest of your life. But God is a righteous judge, and He has all our tears “in a bottle”. He knows why they were shed. He is not blind, He was with me even as a child. He is my defender. So I leave it in His hands. I chose to forgive.
There’s not enough room here for the rest of the story, and I am still alive, but I am so thankful that my Heavenly Father put me in the family He did. Though we are promised trouble in this life, someday Father will work even that out. How I long for the day when “the earth will be full of the knowledge of the Lord, as the waters cover the sea,” Isaiah 11:9.